Therapy Made for Queer Asians
In-person in San Francisco | Telehealth in California, Washington, and Florida
A therapeutic space for those who seek liberation from the expectations of others, from self-imposed expectations, from the expectations of our society, from cultural expectations, from people-pleasing tendencies, and from doing everything for others but nothing for yourself.
You may be constantly asking yourself:
-
As a queer Asian person who came out later in life, I understand all too well how difficult it is to come out to your family who does not seem to understand anything other than the heteronormative life. I can help you gain more clarity on what you want relationally as a queer Asian person and make autonomous decisions that are self loving and self respecting.
-
Each holiday comes and goes, and you are wondering how long you can hide the happiest part (or the most challenging part) of your life from your loved ones. You are wondering how hiding it will impact your relationship with your partner for the long haul. I help queer Asians build courage and self-love to get to a place where they can speak and walk in their own truth.
-
Some upward of 60% of Americans grow up in religious families. This percentage may be higher in Asian American communities. As a queer Asian person, if you had the added layer of religion to your queer experience, you might or might not have experienced extreme loneliness, isolation, and spiritual violence throughout your life. Now that you are an adult, you are wondering how you can overcome years of religious trauma. I’m here to help queer Asians who grew up in religious environments deconstruct their faith, values, and religious teachings that caused self-hate and self-doubt so that they can rebuild the foundation of their lives with values congruent with who they are.
-
If you are a queer/trans Asian person who live in a bigger body, you’ve probably heard criticism about your body too many times. That has impacted your self-esteem and self-hatred towards your own body. I’m here to help you deconstruct social and cultural expectations of beauty and get you to a place where you can celebrate and love your body.
You deserve a therapist who gets you from day one.
No code-switching. No translating your pain into something palatable. Just a space where your queer, Asian, spiritual, and family stories are held with deep care and no shame.
Whatever story you carry with you, your story isn’t too much.
You’ve spent so much of your life trying to navigate expectations—family, culture, society—all while figuring out who you are and where you belong. It’s exhausting.
You feel like you have to wear a mask, afraid that if people really saw you—all of you—they might not accept you.
You feel constantly silenced in a culture or a family system that values heteronormativity above all else.
Your family says that they love you, but their love never feels safe.
You left the church, but your body still remembers religious trauma and feels tighten up whenever you are reminded of it.
You constantly seek your family’s and your community’s approval, and you aren’t sure of who you are without their approval.
I hear you. Your healing does not have to look like erasing who you are — it can look like reclaiming yourself.
Hi, I’m Dr. Wonbin.
I’m a queer Asian therapist based in the Bay area, CA — a therapist who won’t make you explain yourself again.
I still remember when I first wanted to become a therapist. It was in 2015, when I was about to graduate from an evangelical Bible college and was wrestling with my queer identity. To be completely frank with you, I have known about my queer identity since I was 5. And no, I did not grow up in a religious home—quite the opposite. My parents are atheists.
It was my first unrequited love (who was my 7th-grade teacher) who decided it was a great idea to exploit my vulnerable 13-year-old heart and take me to a local church. From there, I had to hide in the closet to survive and to attain affection from someone I liked and trusted with all my heart. I learned to silence my voice and my desire to be loved and cared for.
In the summer of 2015, as I wrestled with my queer identity, I started my Master’s in Marriage & Family Therapy in a desperate attempt to explore my all-encompassing identity—my faith, my sexuality, and my roots. The fellow therapist trainees in the program, surprisingly, did not want to work with queer clients, stating that it was their religious liberty. I felt confused and did not have the courage to come out and be my authentic self at the time. I didn’t have any role model.
I finished my Master’s program in 2017 and went straight into my Ph.D. program in South Florida, where I began to find my voice as a queer woman who had silenced her truth and longing throughout her entire childhood and early adulthood. I met many mentors, friends, and therapists who amplified my voice as a queer woman. Since that time, I have received countless messages from friends and people across the country who have read or heard about my journey as a queer woman who found her voice again after being silenced for so many years.
Since then, I have dedicated my life to listening to, giving voice to, and understanding the lives of queer clients—whether they are in or out of their silent, dark closets. And I dedicate Therapy for Queer Asians to my past, current, and future clients who have entrusted me with their sacred journey of becoming exactly who they are meant to be—fiercely queer and joyful.
Specializing in:
-
Relationship Trauma
You have experienced attachment trauma, inter partner violence, or adverse childhood, and you are not sure how you can your power back. Let’s uncover what is in the way of taking your life back and start building a life that you really want.
-
Queer Identity Exploration
You have been wondering, and now you are ready to explore your queer and gender identity to live to your most authentic self. I will help you deconstruct cis-heteronormativity and rebuild the relationship with yourself and how you see yourself.
-
Exploring Polyamory
You and your partner are contemplating opening your relationship and aren’t sure where to start or if polyamory is for your relationship. Let me help you and your partner learn how to have open, safe communications to set yourselves for success.
-
Religious Trauma Recovery
Whether you are queer, divorced, or just hurt by the church, I can help deconstruct the previously held beliefs that deeply hurt you and have brought you pain. Together we can rebuild a new life of values and beliefs congruent with who you are.
-
Therapy for Parents of LGBTQ+ Children
Your child has just come out to you, and you want to be supportive, but you aren’t sure where to start. I can help you create concrete goals on how to support your kid and help them thrive in their emotional and physical development.
-
ADHD Evaluation & Coaching
You have spent years masking or feeling that something is wrong with you. You’ve never quite fit in in the mold that your family, your community and our society tell you to fit in. ADHD shows up differently in different cultures and genders and often go undiagnosed. I offer all-identity affirming ADHD coaching and help you thrive in your own uniqueness.
-
IFS Parks Work
You carry many voices inside — the obedient child, the fierce protector, the one who just wants to be free. IFS helps you meet each part with compassion, honoring how culture, queerness, and survival shaped them. Together, we help you return to your true Self.
Therapy for Queer Asians Navigating Identity, Trauma, and Relationships
Couples Therapy/Family Therapy
Find the cycles of conflicts and disconnection, grow in your understanding of your partner, and discover how you can re-connect and re-engage in your relationships again.
| $300/50-min |
Individual Therapy
Find your healing in a space where all of your being is welcome. As a queer therapist, I offer a space where you can work on what is important to you, your relationship, and your life.
| $250/50-min |
IFS Trauma Recovery Intensive
When you are impacted by trauma, healing sometimes takes more than talk. This IFS-based intensive helps you gently connect with the parts of you shaped by fear, shame, and guilt. In one deep-dive session (4-hour in a single day), we begin untangling what was never yours to carry — and help you reclaim a sense of self beyond guilt and silence.
| $1350 per 4-hour intensive appointment |
